New Releases: September 9

1. Contagion (Warner Brothers, 3,222 Theaters, 105 Minutes, Rated PG-13): An all-star cast in a film where they all face certain doom? Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Airport 2011!

Okay, maybe not, But the 1970 film Airport did have big names in a doomed airplane while big names on the ground tried to save them. This time all the big names are on the ground, in deadly peril and trying to save themselves.

And what big names they are! You have 4 Oscar winners (Matt Damon {although his award was for Screenplay}, Marion Cotillard, Kate Winslet and Gwyneth Paltrow {although it appears that she is using the acting skills that got her that award in this film to die in the most freaky scary way possible}), 4 Oscar nominees (Laurence Fishburne, John Hawkes, Jude Law, and Elliot Gould), and a Emmy winner (Bryan Cranston). Not too shabby!

However, as great as the cast is, the premise isn’t really all that original. A disease is quickly spread through out the world as a team of doctors try to contain it. It’s basically Outbreak on a global scale (come to think of it, that film had four Oscar winners in it too).

2. Warrior (Lionsgate, 1,869 Theaters, 140 Minutes, Rated PG-13): So, MMA–Mixed Martial Arts–finally gets the Rocky treatment. And this one seems to be a cut above the rest, based on the ads.

The story is about a pair of brothers who rise up the ranks of the MMA world, only to come face-to-face in a championship match which neither can afford to lose.

This hook gives the story a little bit more drama than you’d usually see in films like these. And another fresh aspect is that the ads portray the brothers as both being the kind of guys you’d root for. This makes for a deeper offering than if one was portrayed as the villain.

Of course, this is only based on the ads. The actual film might be quite different.

3. Creature (Bubble Distribution, 1,507 Theaters, Run Time Unknown, Rated R): The run time isn’t the only thing unknown about this film. I have seen no press, no ads for this film what so ever. Yet, the film is opening in seven more theaters that the highly advertised Bucky Larson. Weird.

And since Sig Haig is the most known actor in the cast, I’d imagine this will be a low budget horror flick where a bunch of teenagers face of against a monster that, judging by the poster, is what Venom from Spider-Man 3 would look like if they couldn’t use CGI.

Spend money on this at your own risk. Or, better yet, wait the month and a half until it comes on SyFy and watch it for basic cable rates.

4. Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star (Sony/Columbia, 1,500 Theaters, 96 Minutes, Rated R): It seems the studio behind this film has taken it’s promotional cues from used car dealers and bargain electronics wholesalers and advertises this film by having someone who might be insane scream at us during the ads, imploring us to see the film. Like I needed another excuse to not see this film.

This is another example of Adam Sandler using his production shingle to give his friends starring vehicles to call their own. This time, it’s Nick Swardson, adapting Randy Quaid’s wig and character look from Kingpin but adding an annoying accent, in the lead as a man who discovers that his parent were porn stars in the glory years of porn. He parlays this into a stint in the porn industry himself. Hilarity is expected to ensue.

Avatar für William Gatevackes
About William Gatevackes 1985 Articles
William is cursed with the shared love of comic books and of films. Luckily, this is a great time for him to be alive. His writing has been featured on Broken, and in Comics Foundry magazine.
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